Friday, April 16, 2010

My son wants a Facebook page

My 11 year old son wants a Facebook page.

As a protective mom, my first response is "No." Period, end of sentence, no further discussion. I'm the parent, my house, my rules.

Now we can get into the whole discussion about internet safety, online predators and peer pressure/harassment. But like I said, I'm a pretty involved mom and would monitor his page & his interactions, so that really doesn't isn't my argument.

However, we're considering it. We told him if he got 5 A's on his report card this marking period, we would allow him to set up a Facebook page.

I'm stressing over it, there is a very good chance he will get 5 A's. I'm not stressing because the internet is a big, bad place, my problem is that the internet is my place. I have a few hundred friends on Facebook and even though we're adults, sometimes we say things on Facebook that I would rather not he see. It's the place that I can be "me" not Mom. So opening it up to him means I lose my privacy. It means I have to censor what I say. I'm not very good at sharing.

It also means he's growing up and entering a more adult world, this affects me as well. My baby will be 12 this year. That being said, he really does need start to learn what the real world is like. Like real life, you can't keep your kids locked in the house watching Barney until they're 18 then thrust them out into the world without any experience. Sure their friends expose them to things that as parents we'd rather then not see. And don't even get me started on the school bus! I only took the bus in 9th grade, but I remember it very well.

Experience on the internet is important as well. They need how to weed out the real friends from the weirdos. They need to learn what is safe to download and what they should just delete immediately.

In order for him to learn, I have to give a little too. It means I have to share my world.

I love my boys more then life itself and would give them the moon if they asked me for it. So I guess I can change a little bit and share my experiences with my boys.

That's what parents are supposed to do, right? Teach them right from wrong, give advice but let them experience things on their own so they can learn from mistakes. Give up themselves to better their children.

So pending a report card results, Facebook will no longer be my place to play freely, it will be a place I can be a role model for my son, it's my job & my life.

And my boys are worth it.

Don't forget to visit my Etsy shop.


  1. We allowed Thomas to set up a page last week. The rule is that I know the password and can look up his page if/when I want. This way, I can monitor without giving him access to my page. I think kids overall should just be friends with kids. Some of his friends are sending ME friend requests but I'm ignoring them all...I don't think a bunch of 11 year olds should have access to my life! So, like you, we're taint baby steps and figuring out this new phase.

  2. "taint" should be TAKING... hate it when the iPhone's word suggestions take over my writing!lol And how badly did I misspell taking for it to think I wanted to say taint!lol

  3. Suzie you can setup your Facebook so that he only sees what you want - they are very customisable. That way you can still post what you want but have him on your friends list :)